About me
“I have died many times in this lifetime.”
This is the first sentence in my upcoming memoir. My life has embodied the ineffable, wildly chaotic compulsivity of an addict diametrically juxtaposed (often simultaneously) with highly ordered academic, entrepreneurial, athletic, and musical pursuits. Now, as a father to a 10-year-old daughter who lit up my life and led to my sobriety shortly after her birth, I do my best to clearly and concisely articulate how the various forms of reality interact. Similarly, my memoir is my absolute best attempt to diagnose and describe experiences that most people will never share. For example:
I started drinking at age 12 and doing hard drugs at age 14. By the time I was done with high school, I had a 7-gram per day cocaine habit, took 30-40 pills of ecstasy per week, had tried 47 drugs, had been arrested three times, and spent the last six months of senior year in Second Nature Wilderness Therapy. I also made it to state for tennis and was accepted into the prestigious Claremont Colleges. At Pitzer, I managed all live events on campus, became President of the Music Coalition, played in 2-4 bands simultaneously for all four years (sometimes playing live with them all on the same night while I managed the event staff), worked at an all student-run restaurant, and earned a B.A. in Psychology in four years with a 3.3 GPA. Yet by senior year, I was also drinking a half gallon of whiskey, taking 2-8 hard drugs, and smoking an 1/8 oz of weed and 1-2 packs of cigarettes every single day.
I’m a bit crazy
Or I was, as that 50,000-foot view of my story indicates. Just look at 2012 hippie Jake's shit-eating grin as he holds a carton of Lucky Strike cigarettes with a huge "Smoking kills" warning label. Many of my friends from that era are still addicts, homeless, or imprisoned. Or dead. Which begs the questions: Why am I not still an addict? Why was I born to a mother who nursed me back to health rather than let me become homeless? I didn't deserve her love. I've been arrested six times, and I deserved every arrest. But I was never caught for my truly terrible crimes, so why am I not imprisoned? How on earth am I not dead?
The only honest answer I have is grace - a gift I didn't earn and couldn't have manufactured on my own. My journey to sobriety integrated faith, intensive personal work, and the transformative power of music. I don't claim to fully understand why I was given a second chance when so many others weren't, but I've come to see it as a calling to steward this opportunity well.
When I zoom in past 50,000 feet, I typically watch people recoil in horror. My experiences from that time are simply the type of stories that make people cringe as they read about them in the news, only to wipe their memory of that story clean and go about their lives.
But I cannot wipe my memories. They are lived experiences. I have stretched my range of experience and perception further than most human beings I know. Reflecting on my lived experiences with people from all walks of life, one fundamental truth has become crystal clear. Even those who suffer believe the actions they take will lead to beauty. They're just misguided, chasing momentary beauty rather than laying the foundation for sustainable beauty. Which is why I became an educator - not just to share information, but to serve others by helping them discover truth through their own experience.
I’m an educator and servant leader
Human beings of all kinds yearn for what’s real. In every echelon of society, people desire to learn from experience.
In the highest echelons, members of our judicial system want to hear testimony from the defendant, plaintiff/prosecution, or eyewitness rather than hearsay. Medical practitioners prefer to see the patient, not their parent or guardian. Researchers want to learn from a primary source, not a secondary source (or a source even further removed).
But even in the lowest echelons, gangs and drug dealers initiate new members by jumping them in or having them commit crimes. Doing so gives them experience, AKA street cred/street smarts.
I am a primary source for a vast array of experiences that life offers - both horizontally and vertically.
My lived experiences afford profound insight into the inner workings of nature and human existence. I utilize my insight to refocus the coming generations’ attention on sustainable unity, truth, beauty, and goodness. We earn these sustainable transcendentals through experience, so I teach humans to approach every experience through the scientific method rather than avoidance. “What happens to my beliefs, thoughts, emotions, and behavior if I do X activity? Let me find out!” Only in this way can we lead people to become primary sources.
My approach to education is rooted in servant leadership - meeting people where they are, honoring their inherent dignity and worth, and walking alongside them as they discover their own path to wholeness.
Things I teach
Music: Practicing music was the catalyst that led to my sobriety, and recent research provides great evidence of the universal benefits of practicing music. I believe every person should be able to become a practicing musician, so I founded Practicing Musician. I currently serve as Founding Chairman of the Board for Worshiping Musician (a worship music education organization serving churches and Christian homeschoolers) and as a Founding Board Member of the Classical Transcription Project. Through these ventures, I'm working to create equitable access to transformative music education.
Addiction recovery: I've suffered almost every addiction in the books, and most of my addictions were more severe than 95% of addicts. I also achieved sobriety, which only 15-20% of people can claim, but I did so via methods I personally designed that integrated faith, neuroscience, and the mind-body-spirit connection developed through music practice.
Faith and Spirituality: My own transformation journey has given me deep insight into how faith intersects with daily life, personal growth, and recovery. Coloquially, people speak of their spiritual currencies without realizing it. You spend time and pay attention. I teach people to blend both currencies into sustainable unity, truth, beauty, and goodness. While I approach these topics from a Christian perspective, I respect that each person's journey is unique and meet them where they are.
Extreme health optimization: I reversed almost all mental, emotional, and physical damage from my extensive longitudinal drug and alcohol abuse, which most addicts (and even human beings in general) cannot say. This work required treating the whole person - mind, body, and spirit - with intentionality and grace.
